Time warps - leave the past where it belongs !

I've had two quite different exchanges with people I know & count as friends (I have more than enough fingers to count those I truly count as friends !) regarding past relationships invading or re-entering their lives.

 Both involve ex lovers/relationships and I can feel their pain but in one case & possibly both feel that two intelligent & "got their shit together" women are letting emotion & sentiment overrule reality. I also think that I'm being a little smug (not like me at all - OUCH !) because I recently met up with an ex of over 30 years ago & while the connection is still there reality was clearly sharing the lunch table & there was not a single thought of trying to revisit what could have been. The smugness comes because if that meeting had been with another from a few years later whom I collided with sexually & emotionally a matter of minutes away from the place I had lunch then I doubt I would have had the same calm & balanced view. Then again she would probably pushed me under the nearest bus at the first opportunity !

 So, what am I trying to say ? Moving on & dealing with attachment is something we all struggle with. In some ways I've become far too good at the "moving on" at an emotional level, just sometimes there's a big lag between the emotional & physical parting of the ways !

Fear, insecurity & the uncertainty of what the future holds  are major factors in most lives. The often flawed search for "the one" is a particularly challenging quest for we monkeys but society keeps pushing flawed values & expectations down our throats.

 My flawed advice to both was that everything has its time & place, to try & tamper with the fabric of life's grand journey is fraught with risk & failure. We all encounter people & situations from our past, the skill is to embrace it, recognise it for what it really is & keep moving forward to the delights & challenges of the new pathways constantly in front of us but not always seen or welcomed. And as per the image - sometimes the power of the rose coloured spectacles we use when looking over our shoulders & remembering the past can trip us up badly !

So, I repeat to both friends - rejoice in what you had in the past, accept that once broken it is very rare to resurrect the joy of the past in a sustainable manner  and get the wicked grin back on your faces that "says "let the world beware, I'm awake, alive & on the prowl"  I adore both of you for !

And remember this from a revered & wise man: